As this pandemic continues, most people are practicing social distancing and for good reason. Why, these days I can’t even steal a kiss from my wife.
My Mom’s side of the family were big huggers, yessir. Seems every time the family got together they would hug you when you came in and again when you left.
Why, I had a great aunt who lived way back up in the Uwharrie Mountains. She was definitely old school in the way she dressed, ‘cause the only time she didn’t have her apron on was when she went to town or church. In the pocket of the apron is where she kept her can of snuff, and man did she dip that stuff. Seems every time my family went to visit her, she would raise her apron, wipe the snuff off around her mouth, and give each one of us a big hug and a juicy kiss on the side of our face.
It seems we southerners are a bit more sociable in our greeting than most folks are. Most southern men will give you a handshake and a “Hi, how’re you doing?” while southern women give you a little hug, while telling you “Why, bless your heart.”
Why, there are even two types of handshakes that men give, yes siree. Some men just give you what I call a “token shake” while others just about squeeze your hand off. I’m not sure, but it seems a good hearty handshake just seems to express more feeling than the token shake.
A man’s handshake used to be his bond, but I feel as though a lot of that has changed in our generation. Also, you used to could tell from the roughness and cracks in a man’s hand just about what type of work he did. That man with rough, cracked hands was probably a farmer, construction worker, or mechanic. If a man had smooth hands, he was probably a professional man, like a doctor, businessman, or even an undertaker.
Some men will hug both men and women and there is nothing wrong with that as long as it’s done in a Christian manner.
So how will this coronavirus change our way of greeting people? Even when it passes, and it will, how long will it take us to regain our social skills?
Will the fear, circumstances and trials we are going through now affect our social skills, or more importantly, our close relationship with our fellowmen?
Our government and medical people are telling us to stay home and if we have to go out to wear a face mask, rubber gloves and have a social distancing of a least six feet from others. At this time, I think that this is good advice if we are to stop the spread of this terrible virus.
Today, we don’t always have to go out to pay our bills. Most of our younger generation just pay their bills and do their business online while my generation pays our bills through the mail with a check. The past generations, like my mom and dad, paid their bills in cash, face-to-face.
I know this present time is a period of great anxieties and stress. In this uncertain time, each and every family is dealing with many different life-changing situations. It could be the loss of their job, dealing with their children on a daily basis, sickness, or even death. Some of our essential workers like medical staff, first responders, grocery store personnel, truck drivers, and many other people are doing double duty. They are on the front lines against this virus, while also trying to keep their families safe at home.
I know that there is a lot of fear going around. Sometimes fear can be healthy, but sometimes it limits you, too. I want to ask you a question: Is fear keeping you from recognizing the many blessings the Lord has already given you? I wonder if a good walk outside to view the beautiful dogwood trees and azalea bushes wouldn’t relieve some of our stress.
Today, this coronavirus is tearing through our country, but it will not take away the bond we have together. When this pandemic is over, I hope to give each one of you a big hug or a good, hearty handshake.
J.A. Bolton is the author of “Just Passing Time” and co-author of “Just Passing Time Together.” He is also a member of the Anson County Writers Club, the Anson and Richmond County Historical Societies, the N.C. Storytelling Guild and the Story Spinners of Laurinburg. Contact him at ja@jabolton.com.
